I had a pretty shitty weekend. Now I know I’m not supposed to say that. Everything is supposed to be sunshine and butterflies. But the real world isn’t that kind of place. People get upset, we get hurt, or we’re just sad. I started drinking Friday night at around 7pm and didn’t stop until after the Super Bowl on Sunday. Even Saturday morning, when I should have been at the gym…I was drinking. I was sad. I didn’t know why, but I didn’t want to feel that way anymore. Now most people can pin point why they are sad or unhappy, they know exactly what it was that made them feel that way. I, on the other hand, can’t figure it out for the life me. Maybe it was the lunar eclipse, or maybe it was *gasp* PMS. All I know is, I was not happy. But it’s times like this that I’m grateful to be sad or mad or hurt. Because it means that I feel something. I have some sort of emotion. I no longer feel ashamed when I cry. The emotions I have, which I have buried away for the better part of 29 years, are finally coming out. And I’m proud to say it. And I’m proud to tell other people about it. So while I was pissed off and upset…and a bit drunk, I decided to write something my life coach asked me to do months ago. She asked me to write a yelp review about myself, from a man’s perspective. And because I was feeling all the feels (and the tequila) I figured now would be the perfect time.
“Allison is kind of like Narnia. You’ve heard the stories, you’ve seen the fuzzy pictures, but no one really knows what’s on the inside. I got to visit Allison and the only way to describe it is magical. Allison is fierce, in every aspect of the word. She knows exactly what or who she wants, and she won’t settle for less. Whether it be a man, work, or even a friendship…if you make it in the circle, you’ve won. Allison is loud and obnoxious in the most endearing way. Whether you are at the loudest bar in LA or an intimate dinner for 2, she will make you feel like you’re the only man on earth. She will turn your world around and you won’t even realize it happened. She is confident in everything she does and doesn’t sway in her beliefs. She stands up for what is right and doesn’t let anyone tell her otherwise. It’s not always great, though, even though she thinks it is. Allison doesn’t always remember how great she is, and will sometimes question her worth. She doesn’t open up quickly or easily. It’s hard for her to compromise but at least she doesn’t fight dirty. She doesn’t trust easily, so be honest with your words. She seems tough but like an M&M, she’s soft on the inside. If you see her cry, you best not leave or laugh because that will be the end. Her heart feels like home and her hands like the blanket you loved when you were a child. When she loves, she loves with every ounce of her being.” When I was writing this I didn’t realize how long it would be. But I’m glad I did it. I felt better writing it. I felt better to feel those feelings. So I want all of you take a shot of your favorite liquor and write a yelp review of yourself in the eyes of someone you care about. You can keep it to yourself, show a friend or even send to me. I promise it will be cathartic.