Alright, the time has come for a new experiment. I’m actually really, really nervous. You guys know I love online dating. I love it so much that I’m probably a bit addicted. So starting today
No online dating for 1 month.
*Gasp* I’ve been telling my girlfriends about this experiment and the first thing they ask is why? One reason I want to try this is to see if my behavior when I go out changes. No, I don’t mean I’m all of a sudden going to be dancing on tables. But maybe, if I don’t have a fall back to meet people, I’ll give more guys a chance when I’m out.
Within the past 6 months or so, I’ve become very conscious of when I’m on my phone. If I’m out with my girlfriends I reaaaallllly try to keep my phone in my purse. Now of course, there’s the selfies, snapchats and videos documenting the day. But I don’t like texting people when I’m with my friends. This was a horrible habit to break. I was the person who always had my phone in my hand, couldn’t live without it. I’ve seen girls out with their friends on a Friday night swiping away. WTH.
I’ve never really had a problem meeting guys when I go out. It’s LA, people are very social. And I actually love meeting people IRL. They know nothing about me. They don’t know I have a blog, or that I’m obsessed with pizza. They can only base their opinion on what they initially see, and then our interaction with each other. Your feelings for the person as based solely on how you made them feel when you met and started talking.
Social media is also a security blanket. You don’t see 100% of someone until you meet the IRL. I’d say 98% of people I meet tell me they think I’m going to be a complete bitch when they meet me. They’re actually surprised that I’m a nice girl (for the most part.) Instagram, Facebook, even dating sites only show what we want them to show.
Out of the 15 guys I’ve dated in the past year, only 2 came from meeting IRL. Which is crazy! Only 2 people! And they were amazing guys, which makes it so much better. I feel like if you’re meeting people in real life, you already have some sort of connection so you won’t want to flake/cancel. And we all know online dating brings the flakes. And maybe, hopefully…you make more of an effort with bae to be.
When you're constantly swiping, you don't care if you don't get a match. You have 50 other people in your inbox just waiting for that first "hi." The phone has become a shield to protect us from the big bad world of human interaction.
I hope to give up my fear of rejection. When you give your number to a guy, there’s a 50% chance they are going to text you, right? And that percentage diminishes with every girl he meets when he’s out. I went out Friday night with 3 of my girlfriends and had 4 guys ask for my number. I ended up giving my number to all 4 guys, because why not? But out of the 4, only 1 guy text me. Not great odds. It’s scary to give your number to someone. But for me, it’s even scarier if they call. Fear of the unknown I guess.
My goal for all of this is to see if the connections I make in the next 30 days are the same, better or amazing compared to the guys I date from an app.
So here we go! Wish me luck!
Xoxo
Allison