National Adoption Day is November 18th. So I figured I would write something a little different.
If you don’t know, I’m adopted. I was adopted at 3 days old in Cincinnati, Ohio. My biological mom is from Jordan (which is in the Middle East.) I know nothing about my biological dad, except he was blonde. She put me up for adoption on a Sunday and went back to work Monday. No one even knew she was pregnant.
A letter my birth mom wrote me when I was born
My adopted mom tried for 7 years to get pregnant. SEVEN FUCKING YEARS. Can you imagine holding out hope for something for that long? Not knowing if you would ever get the one thing you wanted more than anything? I certainly can’t.
I was scrolling the internet recently and came across an article that really caught my eye. The title was “Mom's Message to Woman on Facebook Who Told Her She Isn't a Real Parent." I like reading, however this one really pissed me off.
A women on Facebook told another woman that she wasn’t a real parent because she had adopted her child. I was actually in shock. Every line I read made me more and more angry. But at the same time I was sad. I was sad that this woman had no earthly idea how wonderful adoption is. How much love it takes to be an adoptive parent.
My adopted mom is the most amazing mom. I can’t even imagine someone being a better parent or friend. I know parents who have abandoned their kids for being gay or doing drugs. Kids that they birthed, who grew inside of their bodies. Yet, no one tells them they are any less of a parent.
My mom stayed home to do child care so she could be home with me and my brother. She spent the majority of her life taking care of me and my brother and providing the best life she could. We were never hungry. We never wondered where we would sleep that night.
When I was a teenager I would sit at her desk every day and we would just talk. Talk about anything and everything. The first time someone offered me beer, I sped home crying to tell my mom. She wasn’t just my mom. She was my friend, my best friend.
I learned how to be a good person from my mom. I learned how to love from my mom. I learned to stand up for what I believe in from my mom.
I don’t know if I want kids. But I know I want someone to love me as much as I love my mom. And I want to have kids to show them the love that my mom had for me.
This was a journal entry from my mom a week after I was born.
So to my momma,
My love and admiration for you is never ending. I know our life together wasn’t by chance. I was meant for you and you were meant for me. If soul mates are real, then we’re it. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. There will never be enough minutes in the day, or days in the year to tell you how much I love you.
They say blood is thicker than water…I don’t believe that one bit. My mom isn’t my blood but our bond is as thick as molasses. I hit the jackpot. Happy (almost) National Adoption Day.
Xoxo
Allison